This weekend was my 5th Wedding Anniversary, and I spent much of the last few days in dreamy memory-mode.
We got engaged on Christmas Eve, and I had no idea it was about to happen. So when the questions started to come within days, (like, “When are you going to get married?”) I was caught more than a little off guard!
Ultimately, though, my decision about when we would get married was based entirely on my new fiance’s job.
“Probably early January,” I remember saying.
Why on Earth would I pick right after Christmas? What about the weather?
I explained it was the only time of the year I could feel certain my groom wouldn’t have to take off time for his wedding. Its rare for artists to go out the first couple weeks of January, so I felt secure it wouldn’t be an issue.
We originally wanted the second weekend of January, but the venue we wanted was already booked. So we took the first weekend instead, and all year we planned with the hope that my groom wouldn’t miss any work for our wedding.
Our date change was a blessing in more ways than one. Not only was my new husband already on the road that next weekend, but the place where we got married had a freak ice storm that shut down the airports and made roads impassable!
Ever since our wedding we’ve only had ONE anniversary where my husband had bus call. Otherwise, we’ve gotten to spend our day together..
I’m sure plenty of musician’s brides-to-be would think I was crazy planning our wedding around his job… after all, his job dictates enough of our life together, why let the job have that, too? But I wouldn’t change a thing. Don’t get me wrong, I love a Spring or Summer wedding as much as everyone else, but the only stress we had regarding my groom’s job the week of the wedding was that he had to miss a few rehearsals (which was not a big deal). None of my husband’s groomsmen had to cancel due to their own road gigs having shows. Band mates were able to come celebrate our day with us. There were no worries about a sub doing the job okay. It was a no-job-stress zone. It was wonderful.
So, if anything, by setting our date as we did, we were able to make our day even more OUR day!
I’d love to hear other road widows’ wedding juggles due to “the job”… Anyone else plan around the schedule? Or were you able to make it work to get that perfect wedding date?
Road Widows
Chris B.
imacrewwife
Nise
lindsyr
As a “veteran, road widow,” over 10 years now I have enjoyed reading many of your posts and thinking back to how, in the beginning you learn to adapt your whole life to the lifestyle!!!
I often smile and remember the “early days” I couldnt ever plan on anything with my husband. We never knew what his schedule would intale and when and where he would have to go. Now its just second nature.
But back to your question, yes, we planned our wedding around his schedule. We had been officially engaged for over 6 months and everyone was asking when we were going to get married and he just kept getting one tour after another and we didnt know what the following year would bring, I dont think he was off a single day that whole year, so when the Holidays rolled around and we found out he was going to be off for a few weeks, I planned our beachside wedding in 10 days and we were married between Christmas and New Years.
Now I never know what part of the country he will be in, when the Holidays roll around, but unless he gets a “New Years Run” Im pretty sure he will be around for our Anniversary !